Want Change Something in 2024?
Stop being Mean to yourself..
Why blaming and shaming yourself stops you changing..
Often when we think about changing things in our lives what comes with it is a tendency to beat ourselves up for being where we are now and our past mistakes; this can leave your brain caged in a fixed mindset where you, your potential and your abilities are not flexible..
It can feel a struggle or too much efffort to change.
The negative emotions of guilt, shame and self criticism are draining .. feeding into a cycle of negative thoughts and behaviour; not a great state for focus or action.
Self blame can also foster a fear of failure which can in turn lead to procrastination and paralysis as your mind avoids further perceived risk. Blaming yourself can also obscure the learning potential of mistakes and set backs. There is no failure only feedback. Set yourself free to change..
As the Dalai Lama once said “Love and Compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them humanity cannot survive”. You might consider that self compassion is a better place to start from to make changes..
When you approach yourself with compassion, you are more likely to accept where you are, acceptance reduces resistance, you can move forward with ease. Self-compassion fosters a growth mindset, you can view challenges as opportunities for growth rather than insurmountable obstacles. Being kind to yourself builds emotional resilience. You can bounce back more quickly, it's all O.K. The sun is still shining on you even if there are clouds temporarily obscuring the view. This change you want to make is just a puzzle to be solved and kindness to yourself is the best starting place.
Mistakes and past failures are stepping stones not road blocks. Let go of self blame and shame to move forward.
Cognitive hypnotherapy and coaching are so effective in helping us bring ourselves to self compassion and building new easier pathways to change.
Reach out to have a kind chat with me about how this could really support you.
![](https://happylifehypnotherapy.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/01/Blame-and-shame-are-not-your-friend-1-240x300.png)